| Achievement | Unlocked | Visibility | Global Unlocks | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
|
Harder than r/gonewild
Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty. |
2021-07-25 15:55:21 | 3.1% | ||
|
Gettin DP'd
Made 30 kills while dual-wielding. |
2021-07-21
21:12:51
|
4.9% | ||
|
Adderall4All
Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.) |
2021-07-21 21:07:59 | 3.1% | ||
|
Fear and Loathing
Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session. |
2021-07-20 21:01:22 | 4.8% | ||
|
Scientology Level: OT VIII
Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty. |
2021-07-20 19:28:19 | 3.4% | ||
|
Planet of the Apes: The Musical
Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty. |
2021-07-20 19:28:19 | 4.2% | ||
|
Shiva Blast
"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow. |
2021-07-19 22:41:34 | 9.8% | ||
|
Gary vs. The K. Man
Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse. |
2021-07-17 18:45:36 | 4.1% | ||
|
I'm not even supposed to be here today!
Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us! |
2021-07-14 14:48:41 | 12.5% | ||
|
Pussy on a Pedestal
Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun. |
2021-07-14
14:39:45
|
5.3% | ||
|
Hello, Newman
Kicked 30 dogs. |
2021-07-14
14:38:11
|
5.0% | ||
|
Anger Management With Roger Clemens
Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer. |
2021-07-14 14:32:06 | 9.4% | ||
|
Reddit would be proud.
Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time. |
2021-07-14 14:25:18 | 9.1% | ||
|
Uncle T-Bag
Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell. |
2021-07-14 13:47:06 | 5.4% | ||
|
CAN YOU DIG IT?!
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.) |
2021-07-14 13:24:12 | 3.6% | ||
|
SCREW that game!
Found the hidden copy of POSTAL III and peed on it. |
2021-07-14 13:01:15 | 4.5% | ||
|
Michonne ain't got nothin' on me
Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes. |
2021-07-14 12:16:35 | 4.4% | ||
|
You are not alone
Observed an NPC going POSTAL! |
2021-07-14 12:08:30 | 13.2% | ||
|
John Rambo'd!
Made a very long killing spree. |
2021-07-14 12:02:36 | 7.7% | ||
|
I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace
Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit. |
2021-07-14
12:02:28
|
18.4% | ||
|
Fur Sure!
Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them. |
2021-07-14 11:34:52 | 29.5% | ||
|
40 Year Old Virgin
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.) |
2021-07-14 03:53:56 | 3.8% | ||
|
Anustart!
Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills. |
2021-07-14 03:53:56 | 4.1% | ||
|
I should buy a boat
Read the newspaper every day. |
2021-07-14 03:13:50 | 8.8% | ||
|
Found 'em faster than GWB
Discovered the hidden Taliban base. |
2021-07-13 23:09:49 | 8.4% | ||
|
One time, at band camp...
Saved the marching band from explody death. |
2021-07-13 22:26:46 | 6.5% | ||
|
Rebecca Black's Nightmare
Totaled 30 cars. |
2021-07-13
22:09:07
|
9.5% | ||
|
RAFIBOMB!!!
Kicked 10 people in the balls. |
2021-07-13
22:02:02
|
9.3% | ||
|
Paid the Piper
Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest. |
2021-07-13 21:31:37 | 12.9% | ||
|
OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale
Roasted 30 people with fire. |
2021-07-13
20:54:51
|
19.7% | ||
|
Cesar Millan is Very Happy
Mauled 30 people with your dog. |
2021-07-13
20:52:09
|
6.5% | ||
|
Señor Cornballer
Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform. |
2021-07-13
20:35:01
|
8.3% | ||
|
Don't taze me, bro!
Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform. |
2021-07-13
20:31:16
|
5.5% | ||
|
Chapelle's Show
Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut. |
2021-07-13 20:13:32 | 8.5% | ||
|
I don't need virgins for this
Suicide-bombed a Taliban member. |
2021-07-13 20:00:10 | 6.1% | ||
|
I Am Legend
Committed suicide... the Taliban way. |
2020-07-09 23:55:47 | 9.5% | ||
|
My Name is Jesus
Completed Paradise Lost with no kills. |
2020-07-09 23:15:16 | 3.1% | ||
|
Ode to Eddings
Deactivated all of the Vend-A-Cure XJ-2 units. |
2020-07-09 20:59:48 | 3.4% | ||
|
Ladies Love Cake
Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake. |
2020-07-08 22:01:24 | 3.9% | ||
|
Hobo Sexual
Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward. |
2020-07-08 21:56:03 | 3.8% | ||
|
Rich on Reddit
Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors. |
2020-07-08
21:37:09
|
3.7% | ||
|
You Snow Nothing John Blow
Peed on all of the snowmen in the Nuclear Winter zone. |
2020-07-08 21:22:15 | 3.4% | ||
|
BioShocked
Spent $2000 on vending machines. |
2020-07-08
18:38:34
|
4.8% | ||
|
Dick Message
Wasted no time with the Wise Wang. |
2020-07-07 23:37:34 | 4.6% | ||
|
Ape Gape
Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive. |
2020-07-07 23:21:11 | 4.7% | ||
|
Better than POSTAL III
Rescued your loyal companion. |
2020-07-07 22:35:04 | 4.6% | ||
|
Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad
Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader. |
2020-07-06 20:19:42 | 5.6% | ||
|
Rain on your Wedding Day
Reunited with an old flame. |
2020-07-06 17:22:20 | 6.2% | ||
|
Ginger Mint
Killed Zack Ward. |
2020-07-06 16:04:37 | 6.2% | ||
|
Holocaust: Part Deux
Reunited with an old enemy. |
2020-07-04 19:23:45 | 6.9% | ||
|
PooMasher
Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it. |
2020-06-23 18:40:33 | 3.7% | ||
|
GABAGOOOOOL!
Reunited with an old friend. |
2020-06-22 00:31:52 | 8.3% | ||
|
A-Rod Who?
Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel. |
2015-07-19 14:34:05 | 10.6% | ||
|
I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you
Put out someone that's on fire. |
2015-07-19 14:21:26 | 37.1% | ||
|
And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree
Killed all of the book protestors in the library. |
2015-07-19 12:48:21 | 20.4% | ||
|
There's always money in the banana stand
Found the secret bank exit on Monday. |
2015-07-19 12:07:33 | 9.8% | ||
|
Gotta pay the Troll Toll
Found one of the hidden underground sewers. |
2015-07-19 11:29:10 | 17.0% | ||
|
Lieberman is our Leader!
Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office. |
2015-07-19 11:12:30 | 30.3% | ||
|
It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog
Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head. |
2015-07-19 05:45:34 | 33.4% | ||
|
Do you even Enzyte, bro?
Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it. |
2015-07-19
05:26:07
|
26.8% | ||
|
Thanks for the money!
Finished all seven days. |
2015-07-19 02:21:15 | 9.4% | ||
|
I swear, I thought it was a home fill
Exploded a nuclear bomb. |
2015-07-19 02:19:59 | 10.5% | ||
|
Here, Wilfred
Gained your first dog helper. |
2015-07-19 01:27:50 | 46.9% | ||
|
Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!
Killed over 1,000 people. |
2015-07-19
00:55:27
|
16.9% | ||
|
Running With Scissors
Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors. |
2015-07-19
00:41:39
|
8.7% | ||
|
Rick Grimes 4 Life
Made 30 zombies lose their heads. |
2015-07-18
23:13:16
|
9.2% | ||
|
Screw Bill Lumbergh!
Survived Saturday. |
2015-07-18 23:09:51 | 14.1% | ||
|
Door Mat
Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them. |
2015-07-18 22:54:24 | 15.3% | ||
|
Workin' for the Weekend
Survived Friday. |
2015-07-18 21:50:46 | 17.6% | ||
|
Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.
Killed 30 or more people of each skin color. |
2015-07-18 20:59:51 | 24.0% | ||
|
Darth Maul'd!
Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe. |
2015-07-18
20:19:36
|
13.3% | ||
|
It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays
Survived Thursday. |
2015-07-18 19:32:37 | 20.6% | ||
|
Where's Mr. McGibblets?
Gave Krotchy the bad touch. |
2015-07-18 18:51:12 | 18.6% | ||
|
GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!
Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm. |
2015-07-18 18:17:21 | 18.4% | ||
|
Chuck Norris'd!
Killed someone with a flying jump kick. |
2015-07-18 18:13:10 | 11.1% | ||
|
Friend of Dorothy
Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level. |
2015-07-18 17:59:17 | 61.1% | ||
|
FAB-U-LOUS!
Wore all three outfits. |
2015-07-18 17:59:14 | 14.6% | ||
|
Can't Touch This
Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face. |
2015-07-18
17:43:20
|
15.8% | ||
|
OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!
Survived Wednesday. |
2015-07-18 17:28:24 | 26.4% | ||
|
Finkle IS Einhorn!
Gave a kickoff to a severed head. |
2015-07-18 17:03:58 | 32.2% | ||
|
C U Next Tuesday
Survived Tuesday. |
2015-07-18 15:36:41 | 32.6% | ||
|
It's sterile and I like the taste
Sucked down your own piss. |
2015-07-18 15:23:50 | 36.2% | ||
|
It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway
Killed someone who refused to sign your petition. |
2015-07-18 14:51:52 | 29.8% | ||
|
Officer McLovin'
Asked a police officer to sign your petition. |
2015-07-18 14:28:34 | 44.5% | ||
|
Someone's got a case of the Mondays!
Survived Monday. |
2015-07-18 14:24:31 | 51.3% | ||
|
Well, aren't YOU a badass
Kicked open a door. |
2015-07-18 14:07:13 | 55.6% | ||
|
R. Kelly's Protege
Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it. |
2015-07-18 14:00:26 | 65.9% | ||
|
Duck Dynasty
Used a Bass Sniffer Radar. |
2015-07-18 13:55:50 | 51.1% | ||
|
Taxidermy with Chuck Testa
Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun. |
2015-07-18 13:47:12 | 48.6% |